Food for thought - Net Connect

It has indeed been ages since the pen met the paper. It is my fault entirely. Just the other day I realized we have long since stepped into an era where a fellow human needs nobody anymore. Just a smart phone is enough. We hardly ever raise our heads nowadays, Do we know our neighbors anymore? Are our parents getting enough of our time? Are our Kids? Are our interests - other than what we can do by burying our noses into our phones?

It all started when my internet connection got disrupted last Wednesday afternoon and the ETA on repairs turned out to be 24 hrs for some ridiculous reason. For the first half hour I was annoyed and irritated. I switched on my mobile data to have whatsapp usage uninterrupted - I had to be able to communicate with the outside world at will at the very least...but rain and network dips got in a lag. It was then followed by a crippling anxiety, then a bit of boredom  - and then a strange sense of calmness set in. Gone was the urgency, the constant checking of the phone, the buried head lifted. It was a pleasant summer evening - I took a stroll, enjoyed the mild evening sun on my face, the light breeze in my hair, tea time with my mom, playtime with my dog. I caught up with neighbors with whom once I used to spend hours in a week (but a new job new timings have taken even those small pleasures away. What time is left is usually spent looking at the phone and sleep).

The next day, now almost 15 hrs without internet - took a morning walk with family and  grabbed some breakfast at a popular dosa place in the neighborhood, stopped to smell the flowers as they say. Pondering all while as if this was my first time - was the sky always this blue? does this mild summer heat really feel this wonderful on the skin? It was like all my senses had suddenly awakened. If the city felt this good imagine what the countryside would be like with nature and greenery all around and not to mention the bliss silence that would engulf us. This was what was missing from my regular routine - a certain awe of life and the simple joys - which have been replaced by technological monotony. Do not get me wrong, I simply love technology and the comfort and ease it brings to our lives. Also there is a sense of awe in technology too but I fear it has replaced so much of what should be natural to us as humans.

The net which has connected the whole wide world and made it such a small place to be easily explored is the same net that has us trapped to tiny devices as the world whooshes by us without so much as causing a blip in our radar. Made me wonder how we are imprisoned by something which was meant to connect us and how liberating it was now for me to be disconnected for once.

P.S. The net has long returned and I am back online sharing this with you - the world at large - should you care to read. But lesson learned that, it is in my best interest to actively disconnect on a regular basis and enjoy life as it passes by - even if it is just as a viewer and not a participant.

Feed your soul folks!!

-KPR

Forever!

The warm merry weather
The sweet smell of heather;
Children playing in the courtyard
Sacred Vows taken in the churchyard;
Paradise Islands burgeoning with 'mooners
Nightly promises made in whispers;
Are all like dawn and dusk
Two parts of the coin
Not hanging on till the last
Become memories of the past
We would be wise
to realize;
Sooner than later
Nothing lasts forever
Forever………………

Not laughter and merriment
No, not even excitement;
Worry not with tears and sorrow,
Even they be gone the morrow;
The dictator’s rules
Even the radical fools;
Wealth and land
Must also be left behind;
Ashes to dust
With time they must;
Everything today
Is momentary;
Like the fading of the light
Not always there to delight;
Nothing lasts forever
Forever………………

Nothing is permanent
Nobody is indispensable;
We all better learn
Our lives are but a sojourn;
Mere speck in the horizon
One in a legion;
Accept, adapt and acquiesce
Forgiveness is the key to success;
Toleration, moderation
Everything is not about possession;
Vanity, greed in check
World will not be in a wreck;
Let’s leave something for the next
Something good and hope for the best
Nothing lasts forever…..
But still, let’s do our bit to make things better…
Forever…………


~ KPR


I have never attempted to pen anything of this sort before...I suppose the past 2 years of being alone in a foreign land, away from family and friends...viewing the world with a detachment that comes while recuperating from some sort of personal trauma ( I use this example for the lack of a better one), one could sort of become delusional to the extent to hope for some semblance of peace and harmony in the world....there are worse things lurking around and humans needn't help by contributing more.......just one of those days where you feel...in the long run it doesn't matter...nothing matters...everything in temporary so at least let's try to leave good memories for those we leave behind when its our time to go....

Disconnected

It has been a krazzy 2012 so far. One of the things I realized is how astonishingly adaptable humans are and that life does come a full circle.

 I am back where I started from (that does not sound encouraging but it aint all bad folks) A new start at a not so new place. It was 13 years ago to the date that I moved from this place (blimey has it been soo long??) feeling  angry and completely wronged for being uprooted, moving far away from the life I  had created for myself and now finally when it was time to move back I once again felt a bit uprooted and unsteady. Coz you see, as grumpy as I was all those years ago, with all my dreams being that one day I would find myself back, slowly but surely I had built a new life for myself which I had cocooned myself in and which I had begun to enjoy even though I wouldn't admit it aloud :) But being older n wiser now, I am handling changes better (I hope) now.

One of the things about moving is how disconnected you feel from the world around you. Literally and Figuratively. Literally coz I wasn't set up for phone, internet, my friends were in a land far far away, bla bla bla and figuratively coz...you've figured it out haven't you ;)  It been so many years that, there is not a single face  I recognise over here, not a single store. Even the roads lead to different places; proving to us, demonstrating to  us the alarming rate at which growth and change occurs in the present world, leaving you utterly breathless, mystified and somewhat diminished. But you know me : I am the master of "Start Over" and start over I shall.

Anyways this post comes as a celebration to the fact that am completely settled in the old but still new place and also as a toast to my dear buddy Vicky who, oh so charmingly, likes to point out to me that life isn't as complicated as I imagine it to be, makes me smile and also reminds me that some connections in life can never be disconnected.

Questions without 'a' Right Answer

Tis rightly said that everything in life is subject to perspective. What's Congestion in a bus is of-course Atmosphere in a disco. So we can safely assume that where romance is concerned as well, how anybody views it or things pertaining to it is also subject to perception. 


It takes not much to get attracted but it takes a lot more to keep it up. Right? It takes a minute to get interested but a lifetime of work to be interested.... that's why every relationship is a WIP, an ongoing effort. A lot of people use this perception as a cause or a reason to play around leaving a string of broken hearts. That's just careless and a disregard for another human being. Stringing somebody along is the worst. 


For me the interest, the attraction happens in an instant. Its either there or not there (This is not just with respect to romance, it applies to all things/beings in my life). After that I apply the 3 month rule. Anything/Anybody that can keep up my interest for a minimum of that period always ends up with me and my commitment for the long haul. But this in anyway does not mean I have hurt anybody because of this nature. There is no excuse for causing anybody hurt. I never get too involved or let people get involved in my life till the 3 months have passed. That way there is no bond that has to be broken. So to all my acquaintances I am a reserved introvert and to my friends I am a non stop chatter machine.


Coming back to romance, I've always wondered:  What is romance? What constitutes a romantic action? Is it romantic to be showered with gifts? or when he says "You jump I jump"? Is it when somebody understands you without you ever needing to express anything? is it when somebody fulfills all their promises to you and more? or is it that security somebody gives you while they take care of your needs, stand by you, face life with you quietly without the fuss and drama of extravagance and pageantry? All of the above or a mix of the above or none of the above? I am sure the answer would change according to your wants, situation and priorities. For me, who is a die hard romantic with my head in the clouds, I want the whole nine yards, the whole Yash Chopra deal. I want lightening to strike, violins to play in the background, my name tattooed on him and all the passion and the wooing that comes with it. I just don't know where the reality ends and fantasy begins. I don't even know if such things really exist or am I waiting for nothing. The real question is how long of a waiting is acceptable till we are labelled delusional? At what point do we start to compromise and how much?? Does my Edward exist at all??? Is he out there?? Is love out there?? What would actually be worse - If I decide to go with what I have and Edward turns up when it's too late or I wait forever ending up alone???

There isn't really a right answer for these, is there? It's just what works for one and what doesn't. There would be some telling you how they waited for 'The One' and how they eventually got it, Others telling you how they waited forever and are alone and the Rest telling how they settled for someone they thought was enough and are happy enough or not!

WIP == Work In Progress

~ KPR

Leeway!

Just another observation!
I watch national geographic and animal planet on a daily (if not an hourly ) basis :P ......We have acknowledged that humans are the most advanced of all species on planet earth at the moment and that we have the control. But do we ever stop and think about how much leeway our species gets from the time of our birth?
Just try comparing with any animal....the cubs, the pups, the fawns, the sea turtles etc etc....the moment they are born they have to get up and walk the walk and learn to survive..all in day 1.
But look at us.....after birth we are given all the time to crawl, drool, mumble nonsense.....time to adjust in schools, colleges, work......we get time, we take time.....to make ourselves comfortable with everything.... In spite of all this we buckle under pressure...make huge irrevocable muddles.....destroy many things in our incapacity to handle life........all bringing me to the one question?
Is it a mistake that we are given all this leeway? Is our leeway costing Us, the other species that inhabit this planet and lastly, the planet earth itself? Is the price worth it? Are we worth it? Cause even though we tried to do our best, it doesn't look like we did much good in the long run........The planet seems to be crumbling one way or the other...if not to us then to mother nature herself........Is this the planet's way of telling us "Enough....I cannot handle your leeway anymore....no more advantages for you...."?
One can only ponder................................!!!!

Piece of Peace

Well I have been pretty inactive on the writing scenario from the past few months and for that I apologise to myself and maybe to you too, if you have waited for me to write something :) The inactive period was actually spent soul searching and searching for pieces of peace if I may say.
      Life is best described as an amalgamation of multiple problems, sideblocks, roadblocks, health scare, rocky relationships, karma, scary people and pure bad luck. Tis unavoidable to avoid them. The only certainity in this uncertain life is that you will run into these problems. The rest of the life is determined by your attitude and adeptness at handling these that are thrown at you when you least expect them. Having said this, I must also confess that there is some joy while handling some of these challenges ( < 1% of them) and there is joy when you win some of these challenges ( < 30% of them). For the rest, there is only the relief felt at fielding them and preparation for the next onslaught. Sounds familiar? It must if you are still living.
     Why am I re-iterating all this? Because the last few months have been a jungle with a battle after a battle and trust me when I say this, I have not even had time to feel relief for the battles I have managed to win/escape unscathed from as I am still swamped with many others. So now my question is this - At what point enough is enough? At what point is it OK to give up? At what point had the threshold been breached?
At what point are we allowed to catch a break? At what point..........????
       This is just not my story; its the story of the world at large right now. From the news to a friend's phone call, its been one heck of a long time since I heard anything good happening to anybody.

Children

This is one of Kahlil Gibran's from his noted work "The Prophet". The words make so much sense and were written at a time when probably these thoughts were considered radical. Many nations still have not progressed to a mental level where they can let their children be; with their own thoughts, dreams, notions, emotions and act on them without the iron clad ruling of the head of the family. Still many a children bend to the will of the family head, lest it be seen that in following their hearts' desires they are being termed ungrateful and disrespectful. The fact that each has his own destiny, his own path and his own life to lead is not a welcome prospect in many a families worldwide.

Your children are not your children.

They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.

They come through you but not from you,

And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,

For they have their own thoughts.

You may house their bodies but not their souls,

For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,

which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.

You may strive to be like them,

but seek not to make them like you.

For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children

as living arrows are sent forth.

The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,

and He bends you with His might

that His arrows may go swift and far.

Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;

For even as He loves the arrow that flies,

so He loves also the bow that is stable.

Courage?

I was reading KPR's post on courage, and I just had to pen some thoughts down.There is an interesting way that people have...one of my professors brought it to my notice when I was doing my masters...He said, people already set a standard for you...for your self esteem and worth...if you go to someone and say, "I dont know anything, I am not good"...they will immediately say, "Come on, you aren't too bad, hang in there..!" And if you go tell them, "Hey, I am good, I am really good at this"...they will immediately retort with..."Come on down, ever heard of modesty?"

So basically people all around us have already decided, without knowing us, how confident we should or should not be...and you know what?This has nothing to do with us,it actually has everything to do with their self esteem.If they see someone happy and confident, it just shows them that they are not as confident, and as a defense, they pull the other person down. Their encouragement also has nothing to do with us, its just their way of showing how good they are, how much they care...it makes them feel better about themselves.

So now, here are a bunch of people who are actually trying to make something of themselves...and if they are really good, you would think the world would give them a break right?WRONG...the world will only give a break to people who know how to show the right amount of weakness, so that they can make others feel stronger and therefore get something for themselves.We seem to have gone terribly wrong somewhere when we need to use negative emotions and feelings to prove we are worthy.

It takes real courage to stand and say I AM good.But to get to this point also,one needs to fight all the devils inside, all the doubts and questions people have put into our minds since we were born...we end up eternally asking ourselves, am I worthy of anything?

The world has so many explanations for suffering...there are religions that have told us that its our karma...I am sure karma has a part to play in all this, but we aren't doing much to fight back also are we?We just end up accepting labels people give us and living with it...isn't it time for some serious introspection and to make up our minds that we will feel good about ourselves?

Ashwini